I guess that if you read this one, you know what I’ve been going on about. We ordered two computers, they got lost, twice, by DHL, sent again then Alienware started being incoherent about what would happen next. They finally decided to cut the suspense once we asked for a compensation – so far we had stayed 4 entire days at home in the hope we would be there for the delivery of the goods, spend many hours on the phone in order to try to get the goods ( I believe my husband had not far from 30 phone calls with Alienware- and then they say women spend hours on the phone) and by Thursday this week we had abandoned all faith in the power of communication. We were told that Alienware doesn’t do compensation but we should still complain nonetheless, The computers would be sent through DHL once again ( is it stupidity from their part or loyalty, I wouldn’t know). We were also told that the computers should be with us on Thursday at the latest in a spin version of the last interlocutor my hubby had the honour to talk to. Nothing happened on Thursday. But on Friday morning we were advised that DHL had the computers and miracle they had arrived at Heathrow. Nobody was able to leave Heathrow on that day, more or less,due to the fog that delayed hundreds of passengers but here you go, never ask stupid questions. So we waited to see if DHL in London was able to hold on to the goods until they’d reach our doorstep, and they did.
So after an intolerable suspense we finally didn’t need backup. The leads were missing, but hey, nobody’s perfect. My kids can know open the boxes and look at their gift with tears in their eyes. They will wait until next year before using them, which is nothing compared to the anguish we had to go through.

Next year, I am giving them money.

Despite the plethora of magazines that you find in the occidental world, I am always surprised to see how little women know about some general facts in fashion. The sad result is that most of them don’t really know what to wear and how to wear it. I do not intend to become the next Trinny & Susannah but I am also fed up to be asked the same questions.
The first truth is that no origin is better than another. This said- how nice can I be- if you want to look slim, don’t wear French couture. And if you don’t like frills and complicated patterns, do not turn towards English couture. You disagree? You are intrigued? Let me explain.
To understand how to be stylish, you have to figure out how and by whom the clothes have been created. Let’s start with the French. When I say French, most women think Dior, Yves St Laurent, Chanel and Agnes b. Dior is runned now by an English man, Chanel by a German one and Yves St Laurent changes all the time. Agnes b. is still at the head of her line so there is not much surprise here. But when you buy French couture what you ask for is this little je-ne-sais-quoi that makes the French women appear stylish and in control of their seduction. So despite their international origins the masters behind the French labels or names are doing their best to give their clients what they demand. So now look at the French women. Lately quite a few books have come out about their extraordinary waistline and incredible look. So if you want to appear effortlessly stylish, groomed, made up and grown up – in other words female- you buy French clothes. The good thing about it is that they fit any age. You can wear Agnes b. at 15,25,45 and beyond without looking out of date. This is called the capsule wardrobe. It means that you get a few basics that you can marry indefinitely for the rest of your life and that a single item can update when you’re looking for a change. But beware: French women don’t let themselves go. So in return you have to be average in order to wear these clothes. You can’t be more than half a stone overweight ( 3 kgs) and you can neither be small or tall. As for your humps, nothing too big above the waistline or too small under. French women are the only ones who dare to wear a plunging neck jumper on a flat chest and a low waist jeans on hips that make heads turn. They are not afraid of flashing bright colors- but only one at a time on some basic combination of clothes that would have appeared boring otherwise. They also play with foulards and jewellery to add a striking touch to a discreet outfit. Shoes and bags are usually expensive but never out of fashion. Now Dior has gone excentric since Gallianno arrived and Chanel has a German rigueur thanks to Mr Lagerfeld. As for St Laurent, only long and skinny women can get away with it.
When you turn towards the Italian, you have an entirely different picture. Italian women have always been seen as of generous in shape and the closest derivative you have to the stereotypes of the mamma. The results are schizophrenic as a whole. You either like Dolce & Gabbana for their dresses and clothes that gives a waist, tits and bum to any ironboard or you prefer Armani who makes them disappear altogether. Armani has become incredibly popular with young greedy bankers – especially it’s Emporio Armani ‘s line as it makes you look tall and thin. It also makes you look like one of these rich heirs that you see nonchalantly wandering from party to party in every posh magazines such as Hello, Vogue, Baazar and Tatler in the impossible research of a sense to their life until their parents die. The Armani line is better worn by people who are afraid to look out of place and want to be seen in ” the sure thing”. It usually says that you’re loaded and have no clue about what you should wear but want to appear tasteful and above any materialistic ideal.
Now the American are all about the simple way of life crossed with the American dream. Both refers usually to past times of grandeur and the worship of youth. So it has to be practical, comfortable and opulent. It is not so hard to tell the difference between Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren and Donna Karan. They have targeted their clients and never changed their direction. Donna Karan is for the active woman -whatever her shape. It’s about a woman wo wants to please…to other women. It still screams power though as it shows pure lines and materials. Calvin Klein is for the working woman who doesn’t have time to waste. Ralph Lauren is the epithom of the (fake)gentleman farmer who takes his holidays at Martha Vineyard or Aspen. A classic.
I saved the indescripible for last. The English have a taste for the past and another for their multiple colonial paradises lost. They never surrender and it shows. Almost every year you have a line reminding you of the Scottish, the Victorians, the Mods and the Punk era. Eccentricity being part of their roots they obviously have to display it on the sidewalk as well as on the pages of their glossy magazines. The results are quite interesting but challenging. It is not always easy to mix summer flowery skirts with the harshness of winter. That doesn’t discourage one bit the ladettes of London when they have to display naked feet, legs or midrift by – 5 degrees. And there is sometimes a very small step from genius to vulgarity. With this ideal of constant mismatch in mind most women have forgotten to check that their body shape can support the style of their clothes. But if you want to show your individuality, your strength of character and your courage, I would advise you to wear English clothes. It takes sometimes to figure it out – let alone get accustomed to it- but it will certainly put you in contact with a great variety of individuals that you would have never thought of talking to – from builders to millionnaires. Now from Chloe to Burberry you have enough choice to let your inclination to good old classic be revisited and revised in order to show that you’re still in even when you’re out.
I haven’t covered here the nightlife requirements of the female wardrobe as it could cover an entire new chapter. But here again, I would take a look at the different nationalities dpendent on the event I am going to ( and the reasons why I have accepted the invitation in the first place).

The final straw is a simple advice. Do not dress yourself as who you are. Dress yourself as who you want to be.

Most of the traders I know turn towards NLP to raise their chances of becoming a better trader – this means ” to make more money” or for some of them ” jut to make money”.
Does it work?Hell yes. The funny thing about it is that it doesn’t matter whom they’ve gone to see, be it Paul McKenna, Richard Bandler, Michael Breen or Tony Robbins, or the first coach they have heard about. The result is almost always the same; their trading improves.( Their bank account should also improve, at least enough to cover their coach’s bill. If not, dump the coach). My wild guess here is that they would have made money anyway at some point as they are simply committed to do so. Now kidding apart, I believe that NLP is useful. Not only for trading, for life in general. And some general rules can be applied for both things. Rule number one: the difference between winners and losers is that winners lose more often.
You think I’ve lost it?.Think again. A winner is someone who gets where he wants to go. He usually aims for the top; top of the world, top of the guests list, top of the biggest pile of money. But there is no miracle about it- unless he ( or you or me, but actually not me ) have a very rich daddy or mummy or wife or someone who pays the bills, which is not so rare anymore- a winner has to work hard to achieve his/her dreams. He/she takes every opportunity to go forward. And he/she fails, but he/she tries again. Can I stop being politically correct? I’ll say “she” but you are allowed to read “he” or “they”or ” you” or “me” or even “we”. This cleared, let’s come back to the subject. A winner knows how to fail when she does: she learns a lesson about it and tries another way until she succeeds. So she adds experience to her knowledge and little by little, this becomes second nature ( and that’s why it is sometimes called intuition in the traders world).
A loser on the other side looks at things and get ready to play ( life or trading) when he’s ready. ( Nope. It’s not a she here. I am talking about someone else). So he’s never ready or when he is, he plays, fails, considers the situation, lets the opportunities pass, tries again when it seems safe to do so, fails or succeeds, gets scared a little bit, gives up until he’s really ready and so on. In other words, he misses the point entirely.
Of course I am not the devil advocate. I am not telling you that you should jump on everything you believe is an opportunity without second thought. That’s why it took me 2 entries to explain to you that you should have a plan. But once you have it, follow the plan. Now you may have a different course of events-trades- on your way that may force you to reconsider your initial plan. But if you’re clever, that should be part of your plan too.
So at the end a winner gets more than he first gave when a loser is the opposite. And if you stop and consider this for a minute, you will see how true this is in every domain.
I stop the lecture for today as Christmas is already coming. My time to be lectured – although don’t expect to see me at the mass.

No, I actually didn’t start dieting. I don’t intend to diet, actually, just lose weight. I know that most people set goals like : ” on Monday I’ll start dieting…” and on Tuesday they blow it because a piece of chocolate crossed their path and they had to execute the whole box. So the new goal is set for the week after and they use the rest of the preceding days just gorging themselves so they have more weight to lose on the following Monday.
But I believe in getting prepared. So I am tidying up my fridge and my food cupboard, setting times for exercise and reading a few books to give me a clue. My first trial is to get my mind ready so I have started to listen to Paul McKenna’s cd ” I can make you thin” ( included with the book of the same name). The book gives you sensible advice and no magic trick. So far nothing new under the sun. But I am more than curious about the cd as it puts me straight into trance when I start to listen to it. I am not able to remember anything after I have heard that I am supposed to count backwards, a task that is even made more difficult as counting in English is not among my linguistical habits. But I admit that I do wake up when I am ordered to. So I expect the suggestions to work.
Now, what is the power of NLP when targeting the problem of losing weight, staying thin and becoming healthy?. NLP for the non initiated means Neuro Linguitsic Programming. Now check Wikipedia to find out more about it. NLP includes a form of hypnosis invented by Milton Erickson and refined by Richard Bandler and probably John Grinder, the 2 co founders of NLP. Milton Erickson used to say that hypnosis was not very successful when used for weight loss but Paul McKenna, who’s built a whole business out of it, seems to believe otherwise. So I am willing to give it a go, especially as it is supposed to be without pain, no effort and easy. In five words, too good to be true. But what do I have to lose- except a few kilos? So here you go.
Lots of people think that NLP is the answer to all their problems. That hypnosis is going to get rid for you of anything annoying. But the truth is, despite all sorts of claims, that it doesn’t really work this way. It can,of course. But it is not a general rule. The truth is that you have to repeat the exercises, the new behaviour and the hypnotic suggestions in order to make it work. I have seen people cured of their phobias, bad habits, depression and/or heartbreak in a wink. I have seen people becoming alert, enthusiastic or happy after a session. But for any new situation, or any long haul change ( like becoming more successful at work you have to work on it and do it often.
I have given in the past the Paul McKenna book to a few friends and some members of my family. They all told me that they had lost weight the following week(s). But after 3 months most of them were back to square one. When asked what went wrong they all told me that listening to the cd again and again was fastidious. They had better things to do- like watching TV while sipping wine and munching a packet of crisps. So here you go. What you need first is discipline and motivation.
When I am in dieters’ kitchen I sometimes see pictures of their “old self” (i.e. when they used to be thin) on the fridge’s door. It supposed to be helpful and keep them focus on their goal. But my advice in the matter comes from Richard Bandler; he said that if you want to lose weight, you have to study the people most successful at it- the anorexics. I happen to have met a few in the past, and one thing I remember is that they all told me that what was the starting point of their illness ( anorexia is an illness by the way ) was a picture of themselves on which they were fat and in their own eyes ugly. So maybe you should have an ugly picture of you on the fridge or on the mirror of your bathroom, showing you how fat you look. I hope that this doesn’t make your partner run away when he realizes who he lives with.
New Year’s Eve is not so far, so I am getting ready. And I shall of course start my weight loss program on a Tuesday, or a Wednesday,or whatever. When I feel like it.

I am one of the lucky few who never put on weight. I could eat like a horse and with no shame or guilt just gob any piece of cake or chocolate that met my way. As I have had quite a bad health all my life, I ‘ve been wary since my twenties about eating lots of fruit and vegetables and always read a lot of books about diets and nutrition. I never smoked ( although I tried a few times) and never drank alcohol ( got wasted twice seriously in my teenage years and don’t like the taste of alcohol. I know. How sad). I did not do drugs either- I also tried that. But I don’t have an addictive personnality so I have no merit.
I am fully aware that I probably pissed off a lot of women who saw me eat. My sisters were disgusted. They kept telling me that if they even ate half of what I was able to take in they would be obese within six months. I didn’t understand. But as I had no concern about myself, I didn’t care either. I was though sensitive to the female problems of dieting and weight gain. Throughout my reading and my learning I was able to dispense good advice on supplements to take that won’t kill you in the short or long run and nutritional advice about how to lose weight without losing your mind, your friends, your sense of humour and being exhausted on top of this. And when I had in front of me a woman I didn’t like I had no qualms about pigging out in front of her. I acually had to turn 38 when I realized how powerful that could be and start doing it- although not very often I must say.
Now I had heard the warning more than enough: when you turn 40, your hormones play havoc and I shall see what I shall see. Well I’ve hit 40 two years ago and I am still thin, thank you very much. I measure 163cm ( 5 foot 4″ ) and I weight 51kg ( about 8 stone ? – or more exactly 112 pounds). All’s well. Yeah, except that I have put on about a stone and a half since I was last pregnant and I haven’t lost it. I blame of course trading; sitting behind a computer all day has been a huge change in my habits. I used to cycle for 45 minutes every morning, walk 2 to 4 hours a day, have 2 minutes of stretching and so on. Now – nought. Niet. Nada. I get up from bed in the morning and end up behind my computer that is exactly 2 feet away from my bed. That’s not good.
Of course my clothes size has changed. I went from a 6 to an 8 (UK size or if you prefer from a 36 to a 38 French). I don’t like that at all. I have saddle bags, a tummy, large hips and a bum. Still as flat chested as an iron board, but I have always been okay with it. It allows me to have deep decolletage without being vulgar ( this is very French. You don’t have it, flaunt it).
So now I shall have a New Year resolution. I will lose weight. I do not intend to become a Bridget Jones and give here my daily routine of sins, but I will record my progress or lack of and my different trials of diverse methods in order to reach my normal weight. I expect to lose about 5kgs within the next 6 to 12 months, add some muscle and go back to being fit.
And as for the other changes- sagging, grey hair, wrinkles and hormonal fluctuation and so on- I shall fight. Not much, just a little bit. I am quite happy to be my age. And I don’t look too bad – I hope. As long as I don’t double check in the mirror.

Friends and family have a lot to say about trading. None of them are actually involved in trading or banking so basically I have learned to listen, grin and bear it. From the fact that traders are not ” working” as they are not ” producing” anything to the comments that we are actually vultures gaining easy money, I heard it all. But I believe that what is the most disturbing for many people is simply the fact that trading means you are openly showing that you are ineterested in one thing: making money. This is frowned upon in our society. Making money is a dirty job; you get approved if you start giving it generously or sharing it with – in this order: your friends ( nice meals and gifts), your family ( same as before but add the holidays and many loans that never get reimbursed) and finally charities of your choice ( choice that is always being criticized by your friends and family).
But the funny bit is that once you have been trading for a while and haven’t ended up in the streets, the same people as above start asking you for tips and advice about trading. That’s a trap of course, because as soon as you do they will contradict you; if they ever use the tips and make money, they assume they deserve all the credit and you only confirm their first opinion ( this means: if I were in your shoes I would be a millionnaire by now). If your tips fail, you never hear the end of it. So I don’t give tips. I have no opinion on the economy, the markets, my best friend’s grand mother’s shares future. I know nothing. I just trade. So now the aim of the questions have shifted; it is all about: where do you start?
Well, to start with, I’d suggest you have a plan. Even the best traders had more or less one before they started and not many people earned a fortune within days. ( When they do, it is usually called the lottery. And most winners had had lots of practice in that department too anyway). But before you start trading, you have to know why and how it is going to happen.
Why do you want to trade? this is an important question. Making money is definitely not the only answer. Because if it is, you have all sorts of ways to do this and they will probably be easier. It takes time to make money trading. Some people never get there. Some people do, but not as much as you’d imagine.
You have to know when you are going to trade. You may decide you are going to do the UK or the US market ( or the German, the French, the Italian, the Swiss….whatever)- which means playing the stock market. Or you want to do Forex ( the currencies change market). Or play the indices- which means you play the DOW, the FTSE, the DAX, the S & P 500, and so on. You very rarely do all of them at the same time. Do I have an advice on it? Not really. If you want to learn slowly but surely start with the stock market. It moves slower than Forex or indices. But it is not always easy . The stock market have different sectors; some may perform well because of some news or results, when the other don’t. It’s up to you to do your homework. Which leads us to the next point of your plan:
How are you going to trade? Are you going to trade during the day? After work? When you can ? All the time? .My advice : don’t ditch the day job yet. You may discover that trading is not for you. If really your fingers are burning, take a 2 weeks holiday and find out what your start looks like. If you trade the stock market you definitely have to do your homework. This means that you have to be aware of the news, the company you’re investing in or against ( if you think the company is going to be more worthy and the chart will go up, you buy or ” go long”. If you think that the price of the share is going to go down, you sell or “go short”). But you have to define when you will do all of this – and trust me, it is time consuming. As for the Forex and the indices, you have to be aware of any news that might shift the sentiment about them – and you have to know how these reacted in the past . If you have no clue, do not play.
How are you going to trade? I personnally spreadbet using my computer(s) at home. I have several brokers online- with my passwords, account numbers and other details stored in my head and ready to serve; I also have a sticker with my broker’s phone numbers on it – if my computer fails I do not want to be in trouble. Does it happen? All the time. So what tools are you going to use? Are you going to go to courses, to read books, to meet other traders, go to conferences, read magazines?. Are you going to spreadbet ( sorry for the US folks reading this, spreadbetting is not allowed in the US), do CFDs ( contracts for a difference) or buy/sell shares?. Who is going to be your broker?
You have to have a strategy. This means that you may use fundamentals ( very good if you intend to stay in a trade for several months or years), technicals ( most people use this when they want to stay in a trade anything from 2 seconds to severals years, but in my opinion indispensable to just understand the basics) or simply read the news and the company reports and act upon it. Some people mix all of these techniques. The secret is that there is no better way than another: you have to find out what works for you.
You have to know how much money you are going to use. My only advice is : do not use all the money you have. You want to be a trader, not a gambler. A trader is in for the long run. A gambler…well, gamblers end up in casinos where they have a better chance. Or not. You usually do not bet all of your capital on one go or two. This doesn’t give you the time to learn anything- and if you fail, you’re gone. The best way is to start small. Just use what you can afford to loose. Some people use 1% of their capital, some use up to 5 or 10. You have to know exactly how much you can afford to loose and stick to the rule.
Now you have to find out what your risk is. This means that if you play a trade that as as much chance of making you money than wasting it, you are not in safe territory. So it is up to you to determine what your chances are. Numerous books give you stategies to apply and how to calculate your risk/ reward ratio. You also have courses that teach you this. Don’t pay too much money for this kind of things.
You have to review your trades. You have to know why you got on a trade etc. You need to set up an entry price, an exit price, a stoploss price – and stick to it.
Now once you have all of this, I am going to go all Nikey on you: just do it.

Before you sign or buy anything, read all the prints, all the rules, everything. When you use a tool or a broker, explore all the possibilities they are offering you. Be thorough. Meet other traders and discuss and discover what your possibilities are. Some stories are spooky, exagerated, true, false. But it may raise questions and concerns that you’d be tempted to ignore – and this might be a big disadvantage once you are in trouble.
Store your info somewhere else than on your computer. If anythin happens to it, you are fucked. Trust me, it is the right word.

Now I wish you good luck.

Ha! You really thought I was going to fall for this one? I have none the less an answer for you. I don’t know many Muslim women. Some do wear the veil – and they are not the extremists or traditionalists that you ‘d imagine they are. Some don’t wear the veil – and they are not progressists in any way. At the end of the day, like always…- isn’t it what they have IN their head that is important and not what they have ON it?
Now Mr Blair made a phenomenal U turn in his politics this week but saying that immigrants should conform to our culture or else. I guess this includes the debate over having your picture taken with or without a veil. Phew, I thought I had to go though this one now…

So we went to Lille for 3 days. We packed the kids, the luggage, the stuffed animals the girls can’t sleep without, the dvds to watch while travelling, the water, the biscuits, we piled it all up in our Renault Grand Espace, and we headed for Dover and the Eurotunnel. I will shut up about the fact that I regret the times when we didn’t have a screen in the head rests and the children had to ask every minute: ” When do we arrive?…Is it still far?…”. To be honest my children almost never asked. They had game boys and Play station before they could properly talk – so they are used to travel without even thinking that this might be boring. They are in trance all along.
But in the Eurotunnel you have no choice. The engine has to be turn off and no electrical equipment can be on. So here it goes: ” Is it going to be long?…When do we arrive?”. I haven’t been nostalgic for very long.
From London it take aproximately 4 hours to get to Lille. I had been there before several times but except my eldest none of my kids had ever seen the place. We stayed at the Carlton which is situated near the train stations and basically in the middle of the city. So we could walk everywhere- which I like. Taking the bus or any kind of transport with five children is a nightmare around Christmas. There is not much to see though; we went on the big wheel and admired the incredible view above all the roofs of Lille. I dislike being so high but the boys loved it. we visited the Christmas market , but I was not impressed. We had a look around the shops and bought quite a few dvds and books. As we all speak french it is a good way to maintain it and learn new expressions – and slang. We walked in the streets and enjoyed the high and imposing buildings. The mixture of the styles – french and Flemish- has a very imposing structure that I like . You feel protected there. I felt also rich. You see beggars here and there. Most of them are alcoholics. They talk alone and get angry. It is not as bad as in edinburgh, for example, but it is still painful to see. Most passersby do not notice them anymore.
The food is nice . You have lots of creperies there- all sorts of pancakes await you. We ate them every evening , standing up in the street. It’s a cheap meal that fills you up easily. The kids love them. My husband drank some vin chaud- the equivalent of mulled wine. We sometimes had a gauffre – a waffle. At lunch we enjoyed foie gras , a French delicacy that most foreigners don’t understand. The foie gras is the oversized liver of a duck or a goose; you can have barely cooked or in pate. It is an acquired taste. In France or Switzerland we tend to feed our children with eat on big occasions. Most children don’t like it to start with. But after a few trials they get accustomed to it. As it is expensive and rare ( but less and less so) the more you can eat the better you feel. My boys love it. My girls just tried it – and spit it out. That’s alright, they will try it again. The main courses contain usually something with beef or chicken . The French are not shy with vegetables- which is a pleasure for me. With the English you have to search your plate to discover where the cook has hidden them. Lots of English people are constipated. We most of the time dropped the desserts as we were more than full. But we enjoyed our food and all came back with pot bellies.
I am ashamed we didn’t go into any museums or churches. Not this time. I didn’t have the courage but we liked our walks through the city. We brought back food and wine. We’re getting ready for the Christams party…